From Couch to 5K

Hi. I've been running lately. I just started a month and a half ago when I expressed multiple times to my then-boyfriend that I would like to start running and that the hardest thing about it was finding the motivation. I said how much easier it would be if I had someone to do it with me. I wasn't trying to manipulate him into doing it, I was just speaking honestly. Seeing as how last semester (before we were dating), we had decided that this semester we would be "running buddies," he ended up being my motivation for starting.

I'm living proof that just because you're skinny doesn't mean you're in shape. Except for a slightly-chubby phase in high school, I've always been fairly skinny. Enough that if I did start running, or swimming or biking or whatever, I wouldn't lose very much weight and I wouldn't look a whole lot different. Maybe a little. But not much. However, I'm still a couch potato and sit on my bum eating cheezits and checking facebook in my spare time. Thank God I inherited my mom's high metabolism. What that means though, is that getting in shape, real shape, is still hard for me. Because on the inside, I'm still really out of shape. So there you go.

I did the Couch to 5K training program when I was a junior in high school with my mom. I felt and looked great, and I realized how much I loved running (almost as much as my mom, the 40-year-old marathon runner). But I remember it being very hard for me. I remember some days I would gasp for breath and feel like I was going to completely keel over. But by golly, by the time it was over, I could run a 5-kilometer race. And I did. With my mom.

My ultimate goal was to run a half-marathon, but I have weak ankles, flat feet, and bow legs, and by the time I was up to four miles, shin splints and knee pain took over. I never made it to more than four miles.   One time, after the 5K race, my mom and I decided to do the four miles. I was going very slowly because my knees hurt so bad. I remember telling her I felt like my legs couldn't hold me up but she pushed me to keep going, wanting to see me do my best. When we were around the three-mile mark, I think, we were on a bridge and I fell down. I was gasping for air and sobbing. Mom asked if I was alright, but I didn't feel alright, and I walked the rest of the way home. My body felt awful. But I didn't abandon running quite yet. I remember it being summer after my junior year, and on vacation with my family in New Hampshire. My mom and I went running several times, but one time was just too much. I stopped early, turned around and walked back. Mom recalls me crying, but I don't remember that part. That was the last time I ever ran. Sort of.

The next summer I worked at camp, and I ran a few times during my break to "get back into it," but nothing worked. By then I had gotten "orthotics" for my shoes which were supposed to help with my flat feet and consequent pain. When my freshman year of college started that fall, I went to the gym and ran twice the whole year. The second time I went, I threw up water on the bathroom floor afterward. It was the first time I'd thrown up since I was eight years old. I was too out of shape and I had pushed myself too far. You can't just start running out of the blue. But I was too stupid to realize that, and I gave up. I was completely unmotivated.

Then this guy came along and said he'd start running with me, so I got back into it about a month and a half ago. We did the Couch to 5K training program again, which was a good choice. He always got enough exercise from sports, so he was pretty much just doing this for me, so I could have someone to motivate me and keep me going. It wasn't as hard this time around, and I started feeling really good. We always ran around the 1/8th mile track, never on the treadmills. It was nice. Afterward he would always hold my feet so I could do sit-ups while I still had a lot of blood flowing to my muscles. He gave me tips on how to breath and how to eat and drink before running. Then we broke up. And I was running alone.

I am still doing the Couch to 5K, by myself. It's harder when you don't have someone pushing you, but  it's still the same. Your body doesn't feel any different but your mind has to try harder. My now ex-boyfriend having gotten me motivated enough to start, I now had the momentum to keep going back by myself. Besides, I know I'd be pretty disappointed in myself if I stopped now that I'd started.

I am on week 5 of 9 weeks (although it has taken me six weeks, haha. One week was repeated, but whatever.) Today I had to run 2 miles without walking. Since I'm home for Thanksgiving break and don't have a track, I run outside. (I don't know why I'm so against treadmills but I am. We have one in our basement that I never use.) This was the first time in the program where you don't stop to walk. I couldn't do it.

I could blame it on a number of things: Thanksgiving overeating happening yesterday, not waiting long enough for my breakfast to digest, the wind that was coming at me, being dehydrated, the air smelling like fresh asphalt making it harder to breath, the hills... a bunch of things. Maybe a combination of several of those. But I stopped to walk several times. I felt like I was going to keel over, or maybe vomit.  I feel bad about it. But I'll get back on track (Haha, get it? Back on track?) I'll get up to three miles eventually, even if it takes longer than the training program says. I BELIEVE IN MYSELF!!

Even though today was stinky, I have confidence in what I'm doing, and I feel good. It won't be much longer before I start to see a physical change in my body, I think. I thank God that I have been given a body that can do these things, that even though I have flat feet and bow legs etc., I can still run, I am still a young, physically able woman, and I can train my body to do all kinds of cool things. I love running. I don't know why. But this is so cool.

Maybe eventually I'll be able to write a blog post entitled, "From 5K to Half-Marathon".


God bless.