Thursday, May 26, 2011

How to Get a Boyfriend/Girlfriend (Really) Pt. 1

Okay, so the last post about this was a joke, hopefully that was pretty obvious. Now I'm going to talk about the same topic in a much more serious nature. Hopefully most of what I share will be applicable to both women AND men, but seeing as I am a woman, I may have more bias in that area. Overall, this is meant to help everyone though.

Let me start out by saying something you probably won't want to hear. It's not about finding the right person, or at least, it's not about the hunt. Stop looking. Stop trying to "get" a boyfriend (or girlfriend). I believe in accidentally falling in love, and by that I mean, it might seem like an accident to you, but really it's just as planned out as if you had done it yourself, except you're not the one doing the planning, it's God. Seriously, he's got the whole thing figured out, and honestly, he doesn't need your help. When he thinks you're ready to meet that special someone or fall in love, it will happen. Stop trying to make it happen. Song of Songs 3:5 says, "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." I am personally quite guilty of this; I got my first "boyfriend" when I was eleven years old and have had numerous boyfriends ever since then. I'd like to think I've finally learned better, but I haven't. It's still hard for me. Once you get caught in a habit like that, it's hard to rid yourself of it. But there is, of course, hope. Because, most likely, there is someone out there for you and you don't have to look for them in order to find them. If it's meant to be, it will be.

That being said, there are, however, things you can do that will make you more attractive, in a good way, to the opposite sex. There is nothing inherently wrong with trying to make yourself look better. Guys, you don't really have to worry about this as much; my advice to you is to keep well-groomed because grubby men are attractive to very few women, whereas a man who knows how to take care of himself gives the impression of being respectable and responsible, and you want that. I also know that, while some people simply have different body types than others, there's nothing wrong with going to the gym once and a while and trying to eat right. It won't kill you; I promise. It certainly wouldn't hurt, and you don't have to be a bodybuilder to get women; trust me. Women aren't as visual as men; it's the taking care of yourself and not being lazy aspect that is more attractive. Don't worry about being "ugly;" I can almost guarantee that you're attractive to some women, including Mrs. Right. You are called to take care of your body (this goes for both men and women): 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20 says "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." Although these verses are in the context of talking about sexual immorality, they can be applied to many areas of our lives when it comes to taking care of ourselves and our bodies.

Women, I know the pressure there is to look good, even perfect. You need to remember that God made you a beautiful creature. Period. I think it's great that we have ways of making ourselves more beautiful; but I once heard the phrase, "Make up is to enhance beauty, not hide it." I'm sure this goes for clothing, hair products, jewelry, etc., as well. Just remember that next time you're getting ready in the morning. But there's nothing wrong with trying to draw the attention of a man (with limitations, of course.) In fact, in Ruth 3:3, Naomi instructs her daughter-in-law, Ruth, to “wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes” in order to draw the attention of Boaz. Both Naomi and Ruth being godly women, and no implications that what they did was wrong, I see no reason why not to follow their example. It’s okay to look good!

I have a lot more to say, but I don’t want to leave you people hanging, so maybe I’ll just do this in a series, what do ya say? Here’s to part one of How to Get a Boyfriend/Girlfriend (Really)!

God bless

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